thank you both so much. We were talking in the break. Lausanne. But you know, our hearts break. How are you doing? You know, it's just so wrong. You know, sometimes I'm grieving for my husband, and then I realized my mom's gone. You know that I'm dreaming from my mom, and I just think I'm gonna go tell business and then Dennis is gone. And so the two people that would have been so supportive at the other one gone, you know, they're both gone, and I just It's my son and not in my older son. I tell like we're both drowning. But as we go down, we're trying to push the other one back up to take a breath, and it didn't have to be this way. It just didn't have to be this way. We are family. Didn't have to be get it. You know, we just everybody talks about it. 0.1, whatever percent, What's 40% of my family that's gone. So yeah, it's so and reminded everyone this is you guys are in the throes of it. I mean, your mother just passed away in the 20th. Your husband, your dad braid and just died a couple a couple weeks ago. I mean, and you were sick with Cove it as well, right? And you've recovered. And now you. And now what you and your mother are dealing with collectively. And what you're what? You're just what you're going through. I mean, how do you describe what the last few weeks have been like for you? Um, it it's kind of like we're broken, but we're continuing to break. Um, my when I was diagnosed, it was from running in tow. Try and help my father whenever he got called away in the ambulance. Um, And at that time, when I got that positive result that that took away her support system Yeah, they were both in the hospital, and I couldn't come hug my mom because I couldn't get her sick. Luckily, I recovered well, but yeah, we weren't able to be together because of Cohen, and she was alone and grieving while they were both just gone. Go on. Listen, you shared, um some photos with us that you took that were taken in the hospital that you were you wanted to share with us that you took of you and Dennis before he passed your private moments together. Can you tell us about those final moments what you were ableto to say to say to him? Anything you'd like to share with us about those moments I want, You know, even one person. You know, my husband was working up until this happened. He had to push up contest with our son, and he won. And Brayden kind of stopped. And he said, Oh, you done? Because I could keep going, you know? I mean, he he was full of life. It was full of life, and so, you know, they don't let you in there. I'm I see you, nurse, I would call, but I don't want to bother them because I know both sides of it. But I finally got in there because I was just gonna let him go because so many discussions and I knew he was suffering. And I got in there and he was laying on the stomach. My path was going 100%. Yeah, he had a new mo meeting site. Where's chest and shifted. I was like, you know, this isn't fair, you know, it's not fair. And I had told my mom that he was fine when she passed, and then I leaned down to him and I said, Maybe, and I'm here. I said, You remember our talks and he said, uh and I said, Are you ready to be a piece? And he said, uh and I said, Okay, I said, Mom's fine. She's back at that house. I said she's going to stay with me because I knew he would keep fighting if I told him my mom had already died, and so they started giving him morphine and add a van, and I turned him over. I rubbed his back and I said, I love you She said, I love you and I said, You're going to go now, Okay? You can finally be a piece And he said, Oh, then he took his last breath about 30 minutes later and I bathed them and I cut his hair and I put clothes on him. Mhm e left him. There is nothing else. I couldn't e couldn't save either one of them. People don't mess. They don't want their best, you know, I've got it Way bought a thing called a year ago after we finished 23 law school, and I've been a 25 100 square foot house for the mother in law suite and everything he wanted. And I'm alone, you know, I don't have I have three dogs and four cars. I have to households, and then just I'm just got it, You know, we're mass, you know, This got brought into our home. My mom never left the house. My husband was so careful. Stop yourself. You're selfish, that's all. Stop being selfish, and that's I know you wanted to come on. And you really wanna in your grief, which is just remarkable how crushing I cannot imagine it is. You really have a message that you want to make sure that you get out And you know this from both perspectives of the grief that you're facing and also as a medical professional yourself, what do you want? To make sure that people are left with that. People know about what your family has gone through and what you'd like them to take from this. Well, you know, in March I knew it was going to get that I saw in New York, and I saw some other countries I went upstairs to my husband and I said, Hey, you know, I wanna talk to you and he's like, Yeah, and I said, No, look at me. Look at me. This is going to get bad. This is going to get so bad that my friends and our family I said, one of us and it's one of us could die. And I need you to hear that. And I need you to wear your mask and I need you to hand Santa. And so he did. Mom stayed home afraid and a half months and so, Well, you have people that are doing everything right, and we didn't get to hug my mom, and we didn't go anywhere. We didn't do be and we lost them. It doesn't matter how strong you are. People are like, Oh, man, this is so strong. He's gonna make it. That puts all the pressure on him. Like if he was a little stronger, he could have made it this virus. Grab it, no matter what. Forget it. The virus keeps winning. They don't. Alan, do you not think I want a memorial services for family? I can't even have memorial services Yes. Um act of leadership and the the lack of accountability from our governor to president Nobody cares. And so you have to care. You have Thio. You know this comes no words come of any comfort especially coming through a TV screen. But please know we dio and we hear you and Brandon and thank you in your grief. I hope you do find love and peace but we are with you. Thank you so much. Thank you. We'll be right back.